The TRUTH about cheating ;

So ive been burying my nose into this interesting book called The Truth About Cheating by M. Gary Neuman n i must say that dis book rlly got my full attention. Here's y;

well, not that im married or anything, but this book generally explains the situation that most troubled couple face.

I have so far read 35 pages of the book and I like it, except for one thing… Now maybe M. Gary Neuman goes into this later in his book, I don’t know yet,,

In his research he discovered that a MAN will most likely cheat if he feels unappreciated and unloved by his wife. This is absolutely true!! The reason anyone has an affair is because their needs are not getting met in their primary relationship and most often, these needs are emotional rather than physical.

At the same time, why are WOMEN not appreciating the men that then end up cheating? In most cases it’s not because the wife is simply a b-itch, but it’s because the man is behaving badly, is not stepping up to the plate in the marriage, or is not being loving and appreciative of her.

So it’s a vicious cycle. The man stops being as a good a partner he once used to be, or the marriage becomes a family and the man does not step up to his share of the responsibilities and being there. The wife feels less appreciative and loving because she feels less supported, cared for and loved. The man feels less appreciated and eventually may go out and find a girlfriend to make him feel better about himself.
This also applies to long term relationships that are not marriages and also applies to women who end up cheating.

now that's sumtin that make us think---right? fear not,ive come up with some ways/advices/suggestions for this particular situation.
well, i might not be a professional counselor, but heck, it's common sense ;)

1. Appreciate what your husband/partner is doing for you, your family, around you, regardless of what else he may not be doing. This may be hard, but you would want it done for you, and it will preserve the love in your marriage/relationship.

2. If there are things that bother you about what your partner is doing or not doing, how he/she is treating you or not treating you, ask for change in a loving, respectful way. Ask for change repeatedly if it is important to you. (politely dat is)

3. If you need to, get professional help as an individual or a couple to try to help your partner make the changes necessary to help you both be happier with each other. You may also need to make changes to function better in your relationship.

4. If there are problems in your marriage or relationship, things you have repeatedly asked him (or her) to change and the change is not forthcoming, make a choice. Choose between:

(a) Make peace with your partner as he/she is because obviously there is not going to be the change you want. That means you let go of what you want completely and make peace with what is.

(b) Leave because you can not live with the marriage/relationship and your partner the way things are and obviously there is not going to be the change you want

i will continue reading n hope will b able to come out with more helpful facts for u ppl! :)

[credit to n]